I feel this book is something you should read carefully and enjoy the experience. So, I don’t intend on giving an in-depth review here that could turn out to be a spoiler.
I think any person like me who has grown up in an alcoholic environment needs to read this book. Well, I shall ever be grateful to my therapist that she recommended this book to me and it has taken me a long way in understanding the ways in which being the part of an alcoholic childhood has influenced me.
There were many a things written in the book which I could relate my daily life to. And I felt peaceful in knowing that I am not alone and things worse than what happened to me have happened to others.
It makes you feel peaceful and gives you a wonderful feeling that someone is always there by your side. I LOVE THIS BOOK…
Adult Children of Alcoholics Paperback by Janet G. Woititz
- 4/5, 4 from 14 reviews
- Janet Woititz
- 1558741127 (ISBN13: 978-1558741126)
- Buy from Amazon
Gave me a sigh of relief
- 4/5, 4 out of 5, reviewed Oct 23, 2018
I have had a really difficult and heartbreaking childhood because my mom was an alcoholic and a total addict. I was taken aback when I read the book because I thought I was the only one out there who went through so much in life. But I guess I was wrong because there are people who experienced things worse than what I did.
It came as a relief to me to know that I am not alone in this painful journey and after reading the entire book I feel a lot calmer and have been able to make peace with myself and forgive my mom for a few follies that she did, even though not for everything.
Helped me understand my friend
- 4/5, 4 out of 5, reviewed Oct 15, 2018
I read this book not because I needed it but because I felt I could help my best friend who was emotionally distraught because of the alcoholic household where she grew up.
Since I grew up in a normal and happy household and was blissfully unaware of such things in life, I found it really difficult and painful to read this book. At times while reading about certain things, I would get teary as I never imagined in the worst of my dreams that such things could happen.
But at the end, it helped me understand many things about my best friend. I could understand the grief, anger and pain behind all those tantrums she throws. But now that I know of these things, I feel it would be easier for me to help her out and be by her side when she needs me.
- 2/5, 2 out of 5, reviewed Oct 5, 2018
I made up my mind to read this book after a lot of people told me that it could make me feel emotionally better after all that I have gone through as a child because of being brought up in an alcoholic environment. And people’s approval was like a ray of hope for me and the only chance of having a normal adulthood.
Because of the same reason, when I read the book for the first time and when I did not find it to be quite good, I thought my heart had turned into a stone and so I read it again twice.
So, I made an effort thrice and still I am not able to understand of this book is actually helpful or not. There are certain pages in this book that make me feel that I have certain characteristics mentioned in the book and few stories sound exactly similar to mine but this book instead of making me feel alright like how it did to others, made me slip into depression for which I had to take further help.
So, I think once who are already messed up like me should definitely stay away from this book. It simply shows you the harsh truth about yourself and offers you no support at all.
- 4/5, 4 out of 5, reviewed Sep 22, 2018
When I finished read this particular book, I felt the author was someone close to my heart and known me all throughout my life because the book was all about me.
I was shocked to see how the author had penned down the situations of my life as they were; how could she have even known when she didn’t know me at all. And that thought made me realize that maybe I am not the only one out there.
For a moment, I felt completely exposed and the next moment I felt totally liberated when I came to know I was not alone in this ugly journey.
It really helped me identify those mis-traits that I had developed without my knowledge or the issues that I had which I thought was perfectly fine, that were actually a result of the alcoholics I had to put up with during my childhood years.
When I was able to identify the problems and their cause, I was open to take help and go to meetings and counselling sessions in order to overcome them.
Shaped my life
- 4/5, 4 out of 5, reviewed Sep 20, 2018
This book is one of my favorites as it helped me shape my life and bring it back on track. And I think as an adult child of alcoholics, I completely relate to this book.
And when I spoke about this book during a meeting, I got to know that I was not the only one out there. Anyone who has had an alcoholic environment at home during their childhood can completely relate to it.
The author has very well articulated how being an adult child of alcoholism can have an effect on your life in a negative way.
Lucky to have non alcoholic parents
- 4/5, 4 out of 5, reviewed Sep 15, 2018
Thank God my parents never abused alcohol!! Mannn!!! I did not know it could have such detrimental effects on children. And I vow that I too will never abuse alcohol or drugs because I don’t ever want my kids to go through what is written in the book.
I bought the book because I was intrigued by its title and wanted to know what the author exactly meant by adult children of alcoholics. I must say a lot of effort has gone into writing this book and the author has come up with an excellent overview and introduction to the influence of growing up in a family where one or both parents abused alcohol.
I think for those who have suffered out there for no fault of theirs, it offers them great information to change their lives. It is definitely worth one’s time, be it an adult child of alcohol or not to read it; it will either offer you solutions or tell you what could happen and how it could impact your children if you choose to tread the path of being an alcoholic.
Not a wholesome book
- 3.5/5, 3.5 out of 5, reviewed Sep 4, 2018
I would have called it a dry academic textbook and it is more or less the same if not for the vignettes that add a personalized touch to it. There are some information that makes sense and I have seen it being useful to many of my clients as it helped them come to terms with many things that happened in their childhood.
But if I look at it from a counsellor’s angle it is way too generalized and very short on theory. The generalizations mentioned by the author are very broad because of which it wouldn’t be of much help to me as a therapist.
But I feel it can act as a good discussion support material for my patients. So, on the whole, despite a few flaws that I have noticed, I would like to say it is a good read for those who have been in such situations during their childhood.
- 4/5, 4 out of 5, reviewed Aug 27, 2018
I like reading books that give me some knowledge on things I don’t know and this was one such topic. Usually books are written on how alcoholics can deal with their situation and come out of it to lead a normal respectable life, but for the first time I have seen a book very well written on the complications that children develop as a result of their parents being alcoholics.
I totally appreciate the book for the broad spectrum of experiences that have been made a mention of in the book as it helps people relate to their situation.
Personally, it helped me and opened my eyes to various ways of dealing different situations in life and approaching it in a way that will yield me good results.
So, anyone out there who has had an alcoholic parent should definitely read this book as it has a lot to give you.
Was a difficult read for me
- 4/5, 4 out of 5, reviewed Aug 18, 2018
I have been undergoing therapy for a few months now and my therapist insisted that I read this book. Finally, after a lot of coaxing, I agreed to do so but some part of me was scared of something; I really do not know what.
To be brutally honest, reading it was tough emotionally. As I went on from one page to another, my entire childhood reeled in front of my eyes and I used to keep crying uncontrollably. That’s what made me realize that I had so much pain buried deep down inside me that made me so resentful towards everything in life.
Let me share my story here; maybe it could help someone too:
My father was a big time drug addict and an alcoholic when I was a little child. And somehow he managed to stop but that made him take out his frustration on us in the form of physical, verbal and mental abuse. Me and my brother never seemed good enough for him at anything and we were always hit or screamed at for reasons no good. His addiction towards drugs and alcohol had made him a monster and ruined our childhood.
But what pains me all the more while I read this book is that there might be hundreds out there who suffered the same plight as mine. I don’t know if the author is one among them because the way she has written this book, I felt she could clearly see right through me.
- 5/5, 5 out of 5, reviewed Aug 15, 2018
I would go on to say it is a must read if you have been brought up in a dysfunctional family where alcohol or drugs were abused. You might get some amount of relief when you get to know that you are not the only one out there; there are many others who have faced things worse than what you did.
This book opened my eyes to the irrational ways in which I react because of what happened during my early childhood. I have this fear of abandonment, the lack of self confidence and I am scared that people make promises only to break them later on and now I understand why I feel this way.
Reading this book has been like reading the answer key to many questions I always had in my mind all these years. At least, I happy to know that I am not a nut case and there is still hope at the end of the tunnel.
And I also understood an important thing in my life – I should never punish those happy and supportive people in my life by acting all weird and rude to them and make them suffer and pay for all the wrong doings that my parents committed.
Helped me redeem myself
- 4/5, 4 out of 5, reviewed Aug 9, 2018
Till I reached a certain age, I did not understand what was wrong with me; why was the approach that I had on my relationships as well as on myself going so damn wrong because of which I always ended screwing up things royally.
All credits to this book, it made me realize it had all to do with the kind of childhood I had and the utterly dysfunctional family which cannot be called a family because it never acted as a unit or provided any kind of support system to me or my brother.
It is helping me swallow my pain and giving away those positive vibes that scream, “Bad days are over, this is your good time now.” Trust me, I have never been so hopeful.
Gave me an overwhelming sense of relief
- 5/5, 5 out of 5, reviewed Aug 2, 2018
We all think that we are the only ones going through a kind of pain till the day we decide to speak up for ourselves or till someone else decides to speak about it. Till then, we remain silent, hide all the pain somewhere deep and go crazy within.
In my case, this book has been a lifesaver. The best thing about the book is the author snaps us out of our past as she doesn’t allow blame game and accusations towards our parents. Rather, she focusses on teaching us those skills that could take us a long way in life, which our parents unfortunately could not because of their alcoholic habits.
In short, she does all that she can to make us forgive and forget our bitten past and do something good about it today so that we pave way to a happy future.
- 4/5, 4 out of 5, reviewed Jul 30, 2018
The author clearly tells you that either you can keep blaming your parents and keep going back to all the bad things that they did to you and brood about it or take cues and lessons from what happened and learn from their mistakes so that you can utilize your time for something better.
The book also helps one understand the reasons behind their odd behaviors and volatile reactions that they exhibit in the present and tell them how to relate it to their past and come out of it.
It is a must recommend from my side and I think it is a must have for all those adults who have suffered at the hands of their family due to alcoholism.
In the 1980's, Janet Woititz broke new ground in our understanding of what it is to be an Adult Child of an Alcoholic. In this updated edition of her bestseller she re-examines the movement and its inclusion of Adult Children from various dysfunctional family backgrounds who share the same characteristics.
After decades of working with ACoAs she shares the recovery hints that she has found to work. Read Adult Children of Alcoholics to see where the journey began and for ideas on where to go from here.